Infertility Myth: IF is God's Way of Weeding out the Weak - BUSTED

When we first received our diagnosis, I struggled with the thought that this was God's way of keeping us from having children and that for some reason we were not deemed worthy of children in his eyes. After a long struggle, many meetings with my pastor, and a lot of long and hard prayers, I realized that this was a powerful infertility myth. If this myth were true, that would never be a God I would believe in and love, and it would not be a world that I would ever want to participate in let alone bring children into.

Child abusers, rapists, murderers, drug addicts, and frauds have children all the time. For this myth to be true that would mean that they are chosen by God as having better genes and being more fit to raise a child than some of the amazing people I know that suffer with infertility. Does someone who neglects their child, abuses their child, molests their child, have stronger and better genes than we do? Is that the world that God is building? If yes, then I don't want to bring children in to such a horrible place.

What about people suffering with other genetic diseases such as cancer, heart disease, diabetes, schizophrenia, and the like? They have children all the time and rightfully so, but they also have the possibility of passing on those genes. So why should infertility be any different?

I believe the truth is that God loves all of us, blessed each and every one of us with a body that can biologically carry on that love in children, and once they have those children they have the free will to choose how to treat their blessings. Sadly because of so much evil in this world, sometimes those biological rights and functions fail us. The same as when our hearts fail us, or our cells fail us, and we are heaved onto a painful path.

Those of us struggling with infertility have a journey that is beyond hard. That path is made so much more difficult by the ignorance of those who believe this myth and the people who believe that they have a duty to remind us of their belief in such hideous things. This journey is not one of punishment, and it is not one where we are being weeded out by God. This is our cross to bear.

Every person in life have crosses that they must bear and challenges that they must endure. While Mr. S and I bear this cross together we will grow and become stronger. We will face this challenge head on with God by our sides, and whatever the outcome, we will be better and stronger for all our suffering and perseverance . When we have a choice to either give up and believe that we are being weeded out, or keep moving forward with faith, I for one will put one foot in front of the other.


For more information on issues facing people with infertility and some background on National Infertility Awareness Week - please visit http://www.resolve.org/infertility101 and  http://www.resolve.org/takecharge.*