Walked out on Dinner

So, I truly feel like a crazy woman now.

I ran into a friend of mine that I used to work with at a funeral for a co-worker yesterday. I looked at her and thought to myself, either she has implants or she is pregnant, then I beat myself up for letting IF make me paranoid.

Anyway - we spent a bit of the day together and then she invited me out for dinner and drinks tonight. I was excited to have a distraction from IF and DH being out of town and catching up with an old friend.

Of course then at dinner she proceeded to tell me she was pregnant. She knows full well that we are struggling with IF. I was truly happy for her. I put on the smile, asked all the questions, and started drinking (a lot). A little bit later she asked me if we had any big trips planned, to which I replied - no, IF treatments are really expensive. Then she went on this big rant about how it isn't fair who gets chosen to have children and who doesn't. I about lost my sh!t on her. I just burst out into tears and literally ran from the table. I threw some money on it before I left. I felt crazy, but I just couldn't take another second of it. Who are you to tell me how unfair IF is. Seriously? I just wanted to punch her.

My BFF came to my house with ice cream and other supplies, so I felt better later, but it hurt. I know she didn't mean anything by it and in my heart of hearts I am happy for her, but wow, that hurt.